Parent Teacher Interviews: A Wicked Game of Mirror Mirror

EVERY YEAR my parent teacher interviews go a bit like this.

Teachers for kid #1, kid #2 & kid #3: “Your son/daughter is quite emotional. He/she gets pretty upset when he/she thinks they are in trouble”.
Me: “Yaaaa… I wanted to warn you, but there wasn’t a section on the enrollment form where I could tell you they’re half Irish and half Italian”.

Ahhh, listening to someone tell you about your kid, who they are, what they’re doing and how they fit into school life.  I smile and nod and pretend like it’s “news” to me.

I feel bad for my kids’ teachers, I can’t imagine having 30 of one of my kids. It makes me feel bad for all my bosses and of course my parents.

Big MF and little MF

No matter how hard we try, our children are true reflections of ourselves. It’s humbling and depressing. I must be such a pain in the ass. Free thinkers aren’t designed for the corporate cookie cutter world. We rarely comply, we always have a better way, we think we know more and we realllllly don’t like when people tell us what to do. I can remember when my daughter was two, yes two, and she would turn to my husband and I and yell  “DON’T TELL ME WHAT I’M DOING”.

So what do you do?  I guess you could say (in Mr Howell’s voice from Gilligan’s Island) “My child is innovative, creative and a free thinker.  He/she will never fit it in and I don’t want them to, because frankly, we are better and smarter than everyone else”

OR

You can look at your own life and look at the hurdles you face because of your personality and try to learn and grow to be better and use it as a tool to teach your children and yourself.

One of my favourite movie scenes is from “Elf”.

Buddy is different.  I often feel like Buddy.

I used to work at a place where it was an open shared office space.  I ‘m an out loud thinker, a singer, a dancer, a free spirit if you will.  There was one co-worker who just detested it.  She tried to be nice about it, but I think if she could have, she would’ve put arsenic in my tea to watch me die a silent death.

I know I’m just too much for some people.   Most days I could care less, but when I see that trait in my kids, I don’t want them burdened with being judged and ridiculed.  There are many days when I wish I was more like my husband.  His sad and happy face are virtually the same.  He doesn’t get excited easily.  He doesn’t need to turn the volume to max when THE BEST SONG EVER COMES ON.  He doesn’t care whether Halloween is on a Tuesday or a Saturday. He doesn’t start planning his birthday 6 months before it comes! But I can’t be him, because I am not him. I am Michelle, and my kids are my kids.  We are who we are, but that doesn’t mean we should ever stop trying to be  better and try to improve.  Parenting has been the best job at  teaching me who I really I am and who I really want to be.  It’s so hard not to cry and laugh when I am giving my kids trouble for interrupting.  Karma is a bitch says the Queen of fast thinking who interrupts everyone. Don’t get me wrong, there are lots of traits I’ve given my kids that I’m proud of.  The older I get the more I appreciate when people tell me I am like my Mom and Dad.

So regardless of what your children’s teacher says, and whether your child is a star or just doesn’t go with the flow or seem to fit in, it is you who will teach them the most.  You are their guide, their life force, you inspire who they are and want to be.  Your actions and words have more meaning than ANY lesson they will every learn in school.  You and your kids will be ok as long as you can see yourself in them and you can learn and grow together.  A wise woman once told me “it takes all kinds to make a world”, and it’s true, without Yin there will never be a Yang.

MF