Scrolling through FB the other day, I came across this post by a Mom of three, a farmers wife, and a person I admire.
I have said it once and I’ll say it again…..every farm wife/mom needs a wife. What I mean by that is we get married, have a family and then spend the next 20 years trying to figure out how the hell to keep up with all the stuff required as the wife/mom!! I need a wife to do all those little extra things that need to get done…like wiping down the counters, making sure the recycling gets to the end of the lane way on the actual day it is picked up – not the day after!! F#%k. I need a wife to make sure to remind the big guy to get the tall one to the orthodontist and the small one to the dentist and not to mix that up cause that shit is important!! I need a wife to make the grocery list for me as since going back to work for the first time in 16 years I can’t seem to keep food in the fridge…maybe I don’t notice we are eating scrambled eggs and toast for dinner for the third time this week or maybe I don’t care cause this day job which is pretty cool and my afternoon gig which takes a huge priority as well sometimes clashes thus the new term in our house “brinner” – breakfast for dinner! It’s 11:19pm and I’m still up as there are whites to iron, squares to make (who am I kidding….I’ll be buying the freakin’ things for the Ontario Summer Show Jersey lunch!! ) and also trying to finish the HST and maybe do a little filing so I can see my desk! Any who’s….just sayin’….I need a wife.
HERE. HERE. Thank you for sharing and posting Tara Bullock.
I’m telling you Bill Paxton’s character on HBO’s show Big Love was onto something. Having multiple wives would come in handy, especially for the wives!
Or not, even all those wives can’t stop the baby from crying.
Fine. I admit it. I’m not really into sharing my husband. BUT I am into sharing the FULL TIME JOB OF RUNNING A HOME. This summer, my family is facing new challenges. The kids are obviously home full time and I’m neck deep in starting a home based business. What could possibly be hard to juggle?? My youngest has severe eczema that no one can fix. He’s up through the night crying and sobbing asking why he has eczema. My daughter is 11, and has turned into Mr Hyde. She has the attitude the size of the meteor that destroyed the dinosaurs. My middle child is so anxious, it’s like trying to build Rome in a day to convince him to even leave the house. My husband works all day and when he gets home he’s tired and has little patience for parenting. The kids and I are ready to party when he gets home and he wants to go to bed, and I’m getting an average of 460 emails a day. NBD.
I think I know why my friend’s FB post resonated with me. We are all in this together. We are all on this journey of trying to balance work, parenting, marriage, the bills, life. This is life.
Honestly though I know I have a great life. How do I know that? Because instead of getting another wife, I went on an overnight trip with no cell service to a dear friends cottage. 24 hours of recharging my batteries while not checking my battery and sharing belly laughs with fun people was better than any medicine.
Look at all those dirty towels! I hope the other wife cleans them.
It is hard for me to leave my kids. I worry about them like crazy. The laundry doesn’t get done, the floors don’t get mopped, but not to worry house chores are SUPER patient. Those chores always wait for me to come home! Time away, where I’m not worried about everyone else’s needs gives me time to appreciate all that I do have. Three amazing kids, a funny, hot husband, a beautiful home and lots of friends and family who I am so fortunate to have just a phone call away. I am grateful.
Look at this. We’re like the friggin’ Cleavers.
A while back, I wrote a blog about appreciation rather than expectation. I know it, but I needed a reminder. Even though many of us know how fortunate we are, we also forget what we have because it’s right there, all the time. Girlfriend time is important. Self care is really important. Many corporations are finally starting to realize happy employee=increased productivity (many still have a long way to go!). This is true at home too. Knowledge is key, but if that knowledge isn’t applied it doesn’t really matter. I know some of you are shaking your head screaming “NOT MY WORKPLACE! I’M OVERWORKED, UNDERPAID AND UNDER APPRECIATED!!!”. Been there, done that. That’s a whole other blog though. “How to be happy at your workplace.” This blog is about how to find balance, but not by becoming a polygamist.
When you work for yourself or a company, self care often gets overlooked. I believe you can’t afford to overlook it. You need to take the time. You need to make the time. We all are busy and we are all given the same 24hours to manage in a day. Whether it be a 20 minute run, coffee by yourself, venting on FB or writing a long winded blog that reminds yourself and others about how to find the balance. Whatever it is, do it! You will be a better parent, a better partner, a better employee and a better entrepreneur for recognizing the tank needs refueling. Be careful though, you don’t ever want that tank to reach empty. That’s when potential irreversible damage comes into play. Divorce, addiction, depression, all kinds of nasty. Take care of yourself. Recognize when the people around you need a push too. My husband, surprised me with a beautiful pair of new shoes the other day because he knew the tank was getting empty. Support is really important. Sometimes just lending an ear to a friend can do wonders. We will always walk the balance beam. We will always fall off. We can all get back on, doing it together makes it way easier.
I have to go now, I am hiring a personal assistant. NO she will not be another wife.
Apparently the other wife didn’t do the laundry. the little one is in his underwear. That other wife really needs to pull her weight. The laundry will wait. These memories won’t make themselves.
MF
well said…enjoyed reading